Tag: happiness

In Search of Happiness

The search of Happiness is a life long pursuit which never allows us to be content.  We strive to achieve it,  build dreams of getting to that goal where we assume we will finally feel happy,  and yet the goal just keeps distancing itself from us.
Forget about materialistic things, which ultimately doesn’t give us the intrinsic happiness with which we associated it to be, even happiness out of things we love end up on most occasions to be a disappointment.
We love to associate happiness with the perfect picture.  The ideal scenario,  where we have it all.  We ensure that we push ourselves into getting that perfection into our lives. Our eagerness to reach the destination is so much that we forget about the journey itself.  In the process,  we even forget our initial goal was happiness.
If you ask people what is their aim,  would you ever hear anyone say,  “happiness”?! I doubt.
The answer would center around goals which were conceptualized to reach happiness,  but ultimately miss the objective and become entirely something else.
Not getting them only makes the situation worse.  We not only forget our actual objective of becoming happy, but centre the entire failure on the materialistic pleasure we put our hopes on.


Yes,  happiness does lie in little moments.  When you travel,  it’s the journey of anticipation that brings happiness.  When you savor a brilliant dish,  it’s the aroma and the delight of having it,  that brings happiness.  When you’re with your family or friends,  moments cheer you up.  But the happiness gets restricted to those moments,  memories of those moments and anticipation of many more of them in future. We do have happy days every now and then.  But can we sustain them for long?
This is the point where you expect me to write a conclusion,  but then this isn’t one of those posts.  This is just a random blabber and a revering thought,  and yes an attempt in search of Happiness.  Have you found it yet?

Spreading a little Happiness

From all the trips that I’ve done till now, the one last year to Pondicherry has been the best yet. Reasons ? Well I have a lot of em.

This happened to be my first solo trip. I was excited to finally get something off my bucket list. I loved the whole experience of what it brought along with it. Travelling around to explore something new. Meeting people, trying out new cuisines and spending time without having to worry about time itself. Interestingly, the Pondicherry tourism tagline goes by, “Give time a break”. And I did.

During my stay, I was roaming around the town on a bicycle as well as a Vespa on the two days. On the second day, when I had pretty much roamed around the place, was left with time and petrol to spare.

One person, a middle-aged man, was asking for lift to passerby. I stopped my bike close to him. Happily, he boarded the bike and said something in Tamil. After having established that I knew none of it. Except of course Tamil Terriyadu (which means I don’t know Tamil). We conversed in a little broken hindi which he knew, surprisingly. He thanked me for that and I moved on.

Although it was just a start. When you’re driving you can see a lot many asking for lift. In strange and peculiar ways sometimes. Some do the standard waving, while others excitedly wave around to catch attention.

I again met this young lad, clad in a lungi who asked me for lift. We talked a little where he was surprised as to why I was travelling alone. Yes, I get that a lot too. And due to some reasons, I’ve not been able to travel alone much. He enquired about my stay and whether I liked his town or not.

I was almost on my way back, where I met this teenager. Torn jeans and sadly not for his fashion sense, but actually torn, without any shoes or slippers walking along. Occasionally turning back to see if someone stops their vehicle to reduce his effort to walk back home. Or to wherever he meant to be taken to.

I stopped and he was almost expressionless at that time. I signaled him to hop on, which he did and finally put on a little smile. He knew a little English, so we talked. I asked him about what he does to which he replied that he was a daily wage labor and usually heads back home at this time. From what we could talk, it was not very clear because of the language issue. I took out my camera and told him to pose for it, which he was very reluctant to. He then offered to take a picture of me in my camera. Even though I had to teach him on handling the camera, he did take one.

This picture was clicked by the him..

This picture was clicked by him..


Having clicked me, he was happy. As if he has learnt something new. He returned me the camera and shaking hands he went away. I was waiting for the signal to turn Red,  while I saw him dancing happily and running into the lane.

I was smiling. It felt good. A different kind of good.

This Entry is part of the #LookUp Stories series by Housing.com in association with Indiblogger.

6 long months…


7.00AM!! An early start to the day (by my established standards), I woke up to find the bathroom already occupied. Looked around to find one of other guy in the room was still sleeping. Sat there on my bed itself, waiting for my turn, deep into thoughts about what all was going to come from today onwards. With this initiation of thoughts, the “early-morning-formalities” continued followed by namaz and then the day started and a new journey.

Well, that was exactly 6 months back. 18th june.

Wish I could use, “time flies fast” here. But, I just cannot. It seems pretty long ago. 6 months in itself is long. 220 days!! 5280 hours!!! 316800 minutes!! 19008000 seconds!!! It’s effing that long.

From running a 10k marathon to playing a amazing-race kinda game to late night coffees to food hunting post-midnight. All of this could happen because of me being here and yes, I loved them all.

And today, after two trimesters!! 13 papers!! Numerous lectures and interactions, Events, fests and competitions, if I had to just ask one question to myself, as to what I have learnt. The biggest of them has been to understand myself. Myself, the complicated one. My flaws, misjudgments, strengths and weaknesses. Also, understood that this was just an initiation of my realization process, there’s still more to find out.

During this long stay over here (yes, I’ll stress on that long, for a long-long time), there were many events that made me learn (sadly, books are not part of it).The people of this college being the ones from whom the actual learning process happened. There were learning from what they said, and what they didn’t.  Learning from what they thought about me and how that in turn influenced changing my perceptions towards them, learning from adjusting with them by seeing how they do the same. There was learning as to how people even change with course of time, how just for the sake of girls they change. How there are people who selflessly help you, how some are selfish too. How getting low marks, change their attitude, how some get a joke, some don’t. How things change from one culture to another, from one language to another. How bad food can be made, how money doesn’t last post the first week after you take it out from your account, how to manage without water before going to class, how breakfast just goes out of your schedule, how different festivals bring about a sense of happiness and bonhomie, and many such how’s and their answers.

Even how some insensitive people even post “blogs” regarding cultural differences out there on public platforms!!  Seriously, how idiotic ? 🙂

Waise blog se yaad aaya, been blogging quite a lot. So much so, that people keep telling. “Dude!! Stop writing”,” yaar, ye kyun nahi likhta blog me”, “ab ise bhi mat likh dena”, “firse ?”  and some also had nice encouraging words too.

I know, I am not one of the best in terms of writing out here, yet the one saying, I’ve always followed “the only way to improve your writing is, to write more”.

Learning, yes.  Learning again.


There are many changes that I can notice in myself. Per se, there’s this new found optimism. Optimism, that everything happens for good. What has happened is for the good and what is going to take place in future will also be good (in sha ALLAH). Understanding, things I didn’t use to before and many such things in my long-list of learning from these 6 months, 6 Long months actually.

With practice, I have become quite a good dhobi too and can wash two full buckets of clothes in one go. Although, there’s too much to learn In terms of how to make them look clean too.

Academically, well don’t have anything to brag about. But yes, have learnt to put in hard work and devote time to studies.


Right now, I’m just 1/3rd of an MBA. A whole lot of things to look forward to, new experiences, new friends and new beginnings. Forgetting things, which doesn’t matter and keeping focus on the ones which does. Ending the ends, and starting new trends.

Its happiness all around XIME, every face looks just so happy. Bidding goodbyes and New Year wishes is to be seen everywhere. Even I’ve finished packing my bags and not to mention just how happy I am. 🙂Image

Happy holidays. 🙂

A Muslim Boy’s Diwali

Abbu Abbu.. diwali ke lie pathaake lane hain..paiseee do na”, with child-like innocence, I asked for money to buy firecrackers for diwali.  Dada , sitting nearby, before Abbu could reply, remarked kaiku re wo paise barbad karna… paise jalaaane ke jaisa ich na wo”. (Why burn money by buying those?) in his Dakkhani.

This scene, year over year, can be seen at home every Diwali.

By the time it was evening, I would definitely have some pathaakas with me from my “sources”, which included my dadi, who would part away some money from her khazaana. I would already make sure I had my emergency money in place from Abbu as well in the name of  “stationary”.


happy diwali

Evenings were not limited to lightening firecrackers alone. Although they were a part of it.

Diwali houses” made from mud and wood (with help from Ammi), batasha and mudi, would also be present as part of the celebrations. The diwali house preparation begins in the afternoon itself when the sun is out, so as to let the mud dry up. Colorful papers, all the toys, including those small kitchen cutleries, will adorn our new Diwali house for the course of the 3-day celebrations.

Once, it starts getting a little dark, you could see and hear firecrackers buzzing all around the dark skies, and we as kids, would excitedly merry around before starting our own spree of Fuljhaddis, Chakris, Anaar, Snakes, Mirchi Pathake, etc, while our neighbours would try to outdo us. All of the pathakaas would be in moderate amount, so we would make sure that we don’t finish the entire quota in one day. No one wants to be the kid who finishes off the first.

Then we also had “guests “coming in large numbers to pay our diwali homes a visit. This included, our basti wale friends, coming in one-by-one, bringing with them sweets and firecrackers. We would give them something to eat (after all, atithi devo bhava 🙂 ), fire a few firecrackers and then would follow the ritual of diwali home hopping post that.

And surprise, surprise! When the evening was about to end and we’d be up there on the terrace watching the lit up sky, dada would bring home some more firecrackers!! Yes, the same dada who was preaching us about “wasting money” and blah blah. All of us would again revel in the joy of those bonus firecrackers.  We had our unique way of celebrating this festival of lights, which was so much fun back then.

Of course, I miss dada , who is no more in person with us. That diwali celebration at home gradually stopped as we grew up. It wasn’t about religion, it was all about having fun and enjoying ourselves. And mind you, we lived in a Muslim locality, so there wasn’t even any compulsion to celebrate under peer pressure. Diwali used to be an Indian festival as opposed to a Hindu festival, back then.

Festivals in India are about the celebration of culture and upholding the idea of India. Over the years, we have strengthened this bond, and let us hope that it continues. Even with forces trying to make it otherwise.

muslims doing puja in india

Religion and culture are two different things. I may not pray or participate in a Puja, but I would celebrate the joy of festivities. Usually one sees images of Muslims (in skull caps) praying to Hindu deities. Sorry, I won’t do that. A muslim is not supposed to indulge in idol worship and I sincerely hope others understood this and take this as disrespect. As I, nor the others, mean any disrespect!

It is of course an individual’s choice, but this photo alone doesn’t define secularism. Secularism means respecting others’ religion and having the freedom to celebrate and practice our faiths the way we want. Each of our religions has earmarked a few boundaries, the principles and the code we have to abide by. And that should be respected by each of us.

Celebrating joy is beautiful and who doesn’t want to do that? Methods might be different but the intentions are always right.

[Related Reading: Why Urdu is not a “Muslim Language”]

Celebration and cultural bonhomie is something we should all strive for. The idea of India needs to be preserved. It cannot happen by forcing a ban on eating something or calling people anti-national or pakistanis. It can only happen when we consider all of us as equals and strive to progress further.


Being optimistic is a virtue that only “few” enjoy.

Our life is such that even though we are not among those “few”, we still try to portray ourselves as such. And do a pretty decent job in putting up an “optimistic” face in front of others.
Kudos to people like us, because it is indeed difficult.
Difficult in the sense that our lives are so complex that having problems of various degrees is not a new thing. We all go through them as if they are routine. But we never shy away from thinking that all of this will get over “one fine day”. But we definitely don’t know when will that fine day come into our lives. Do we?
Think about these situations.
1. Exams are due next week. We still haven’t completed our course and we go, ‘we will complete it.’
2. Our team is almost sure of losing. A six or a wicket. And we might just sneak in a win.
3. The next door hottie doesn’t throw a fleeting glance at us, still, we spend hours fantasizing about that first date.
A voice inside our head screams, “Never gonna happen”.
While the other says, “What if, it does?”
Hell yeah, we are Optimist.
Or should we say Pseudo- optimist??
Are we forcing ourselves into becoming pseudo-optimists?? And is this a good thing??
The answer to the above question is a definite “yes”.
Why, do you ask?
Because if we don’t do that, then either we become like those sad pessimists, or simply let negativity get the better of us.
You may believe yourself when you say you may finish your course prior to your exams or you may even get that hottie on a date (That’s a little far-fetched).
And Sports definitely is something where anything can happen. Of course, Langoors catching Angoors, isn’t new as well. 
So change your approach, it is great if you are born-optimist and if you don’t then force yourself to become one.
Become a Pseudo-optimist.
Update: So, what’s changed over the years? (I’m updating this after 4 Years and 5 Months)
Apart from looking at what I wrote years earlier and laughing at my own writing, you mean?
Well, I continue to be a pseudo-optimist. Not for the points, I mentioned above. But about life in general. I’ve become more thankful to my past and look forward to future. There is an acceptance of reality, far less pessimism and a little extra optimism.
Hopefully, in a few years’ time, I’ll again look back at this post, and update it with a few more good thoughts.
Now, that’s optimism. Right ?

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén